#13 – So You Didn't Summit. Here's How to Feel Better.

mountaineering man on snow slope with ice ax watching sunrise

It's one of the saddest things that can happen to a mountaineer. You spend months training, buy $700 boots, travel around the world ... and then you don't summit. Suddenly you're overwhelmed by disappointment, second guessing yourself, and feeling like a total failure.

But believe it or not, missing a summit here and there can make you a better mountaineer and a happier, more resilient human in the long run. The truth is that all successful mountaineers have long lists of unfinished peaks — and that we often learn valuable life lessons from these so-called failures.

In this episode, let's talk about:

  • First aid for the soul: What to do right afterward to feel better

  • How to lower the stakes by loving your entire training journey

  • Understanding what you can and can't control, and the mindset benefits of surrender

  • Trip planning tips that can help to ease your disappointment if you don't summit

  • Life lessons I've learned from my "unfinished" summits

I'd like to say that I hope you never need this episode. But honestly, if you keep mountaineering, you inevitably will at some point! So keep this one on your phone for those days when you need some peppermint schnapps-infused hot chocolate for the mountaineering soul.

Listen Now!

Resources/Links Mentioned

Further Reading on the Blog

Episode Sneak Peek

  • [1:06] The Facebook Group post that inspired this episode. Why it’s important to talk about our mountaineering “failures” as well as our successes.

  • [2:25] My long list of “unfinished peaks.” Why Orizaba was the one that stung the most.

  • [4:05] Why missing the summit feels like such a gut punch. How internalized patriarchy and sexism plays into our disappointment in the outdoors. The mountaineering personality and summit fever – so strong they kill.

  • [7:02] The unvarnished truth about our sport. Why the most successful mountaineers also have long lists of “unfinished” peaks – and there’s no way around this.

  • [9:43] First aid for the soul in the immediate aftermath. How to use thought work and journaling to understand what you’re making this experience mean. The importance of self-compassion and having your own back in mountaineering and in life.

  • [14:53] How to “disappointment-proof” your mountaineering trip with thoughtful planning. The value of having “B” goals.

  • [16:18] Why mountaineering is SO not worth it if you don’t love the entire training journey – and how to do just that.

  • [18:16] How the mindfulness practice of trust and surrender can help you become a more balanced mountaineer. The mantra that changed by life. Why the universe sends us failures. What I’ve learned from my “unfinished” mountains.

Listen Now!

Our Sponsor

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